Telltale Hyperactivities
by Resting Sovereign
Summary: Collection of drabbles that uses jokes and quotes as plots. Enjoy reading and please review! The third hyperactivity is up! For My Friends: featuring Naruto and Orochimaru
1. Hyperactivity One

**Telltale Hyperactivities**

_Disclaimer:_ I don't own Naruto or the joke used as the plot.

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_Hyperactivity One:_ **Accursed Love**

**ONE ONE ONE ONE ONE**

Once upon a time, there was a very obnoxious, loud and hyper prince.

His name was Uzumaki Naruto.

Naruto was known for having the most number of rambles in one day. He could prolong a conversation for hours when it could be finished in less than a minute. Though he was handsome and his features were definitely exotic, he was hated by most of the village population because of his obnoxiousness.

This hatred of the villagers led to drastic happenings. Danzo, a self-proclaimed leader of the village's organization against the loud brat, summoned a fairy.

Kyuubi the nine-winged fairy.

Kyuubi was known for her power but she was also known for her sudden bouts of blood lusts. Fortunately, or unfortunately, Danzo summoned her while she was in _that_ mood so he had to offer twenty of the willing villagers' lives. He asked the fairy to curse, or if possible, kill, the obnoxious prince for the good of the village. Though, truthfully, it was more for the good of his plans to take over the village since the prince was the last heir.

And so, on the night before the prince's birthday, Kyuubi decided to visit him. She got a good look to the sleeping prince's face and she immediately fell in love at first sight. She pitied the boy but her work had to be done. She cast a spell on the sleeping boy and decided to make the punishment a little lighter.

His punishment was to only speak a word per year.

**ONE ONE ONE ONE ONE**

Naruto was deeply depressed when he found out that he could only speak one word per year. He also found it the hard way.

_Naruto groaned when the morning sunlight blinded him the moment he opened his eyes. He sat up in his bed, rubbing his eyes, before grinning. It was his birthday today. He did the same routine every morning and soon, he was bouncing towards the dining room._

_He found his precious people waiting for him and smiling from the table. _

"_Happy 16__th__ birthday brat! Did you have a good night sleep?" Jiraiya, his uncle, greeted him first._

_If possible, the prince's grin went wider._

"_Yeah –" And he was talking nonstop again. Only this time, no sound was coming out of his mouth._

_The occupant's of the palace panicked because of what happened. Who could not? The only heir to the kingdom became suddenly mute. They called for all sort of healer when Tsunade, his aunt and the greatest healer in the kingdom, failed to restore his voice. Soon enough, they found that it was a hopeless case. Naruto wailed and wailed but they couldn't hear any sound coming from the boy except the sound of his hiccups._

The only good thing there was that if he managed to not speak for the whole year, he could save the words for the next year.

He was now doomed to spend the rest of his life silent and gloomy.

Gloomy until he met the girl of his dreams.

**ONE ONE ONE ONE ONE**

Haruno Sakura is a very beautiful princess. She's not only beautiful but she's also smart. She was the girl in Naruto's dreams.

When Naruto saw her in the market from his balcony, he immediately decided and promised himself to save his words for the next nine years so he could utter one complete sentence to the girl.

Though the years were unnervingly so quiet, he did not utter any single word and kept his promise. When the day when he could now utter nine words to complete a sentence, he immediately ordered – a written order – to take him to her kingdom. He was relieved to find the girl still single.

He entered the room where they would meet and he found her smiling at him kindly. He grew nervous when Sakura suddenly asked him if he liked tea. He could only nod his consent.

When the girl started to pour tea to their cups he gulped once before blurting out the words he so wanted to say.

"My lady, I love you. Will you marry me?"

The girl paused and looked up to him. She was still smiling sweetly and kindly. Almost _too _kind. When she opened her mouth to speak, Naruto held his breath.

"Pardon?"

And Naruto fainted right on the spot.

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Reviews please! XP Sorry for the grammar and spelling mistakes, this was done at looks at the clock 1 in the morning. grin 


	2. Hyperactivity Two

Telltale Hyperactivities

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or the joke used as the plot.  
**Warning: Implied Yaoi! Rating of this chapter is on either T or M. Depends on how you look at it. And no, there's no incest here.**

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Hyperactivity Two: Like Prunes

**TWO TWO TWO TWO TWO**

_Kiba was never known because of modesty. _

_He would always be infamous with his brash and very frank uncalled-for remarks but not, oh absolutely not, because of modesty. And this habit of his often leads him to either a small trouble that only includes small brawls or a huge trouble that includes his father disowning him._

_Well, it never bothered Kiba since he frequently only ends up with small brawls but this time…_

_This time, it might just end up will the last one_

**TWO TWO TWO TWO TWO**

"Dad! I'm home!" Kiba called upon entering their household, a mischievous grin adorning his features. He dropped his bags carelessly to one corner, not bothering to pick up the pieces of paper that accidentally flew out from his folders.

There was a small shuffling from kitchen before a man emerged, wearing an apron. A pink apron that has a 'Eat Me' print in it.

"Shit!" Kiba exclaimed, "You look like a gay pervert!" He then, burst out laughing.

His father narrowed his eyes on him (1), "Kiba, mind your language." He reprimanded the boy.

"Yeah, yeah." Kiba dismissed the warning easily, evidently used to his fathers threats. "Oh you know what? My classmate's balls are like prunes!"

His father gave a loud laugh at the news of his son. "What? Too small and wrinkly?" His father's eyes shone with amusement.

Kiba gave short laugh on his own.

"Fuck no! It's rather big and man, it's the taste dude! The taste!"

…

…

…

"KIBBBAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

**TWO TWO TWO TWO TWO**

That afternoon, Kiba was sadly kicked out of their house.

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(1) I bet you had a have time figuring out to which character the pronouns represent. 

I'm sorry! This was just stuck in my head and I really need to write it now even though I'm so incoherent and dizzy. That's because I have a college entrance test tomorrow and I'm so stressed. T.T Sorry for the spelling and grammar mistakes. Please review and wish me luck.


	3. Hyperactivity Three

**Telltale Hyperactivities**

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or the joke/quote used as the plot.

_Warning: Rated for swear words._

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**Hyperactivity Three:**_**For My Friends**_

_**THREE THREE THREE THREE THREE**_

Naruto glared at the man before him.

"Orochimaru," he spat, "you fucking bastard." He was captured when their team attacked the snake bastard's hideout. They didn't plan on the sudden ambush to them so he sacrificed himself so his teammates can get away safely.

"Naruto-kun, you never learn, don't you? How can you possibly imagine that you can defeat me single-handedly when even the old fool himself failed."

"Shut up! Don't talk about the Sandaime like that!"

"Nothing's change even after three years of training Naruto-kun." Orochimaru chuckled darkly. "Ah well, you are a fool nonetheless." He narrowed his eyes at him. "Would you die for your so-called friends, Naruto-kun?"

Orochimaru's eyes narrowed further when the boy suddenly gave a howling laugh. He stared at the now crimson eyes of the Kyuubi brat.

"No." A burst of red chakra made Orochimaru take a step backward. "I'd kill for them."

--

_a man pointed a knife at me and asked,_

_"would you die for your friends?"_

_funny, he didn't know i had a gun with me. _

_so I shot him and said,_

_"no, I kill for them."_


End file.
